One particular phrase continues to rattle around in my head during this time of dealing with the COVID-19 pandemic, and I find myself saying it often to friends, family, and clients: “These are strange times we are living in right now.”
Not only are we witnessing a global pandemic that I believe is unprecedented in many ways, but many of us here in Michigan, in other states, and around the world are trying to figure out how to navigate stay-at-home orders, home-schooling of various sorts, travel restrictions, toilet paper and hand sanitizer shortages, and (for me anyway) consumption of mass quantities of Cadbury Cream Eggs and Starburst jelly beans.
As we watch the news, look at our Facebook feeds, and check out Instagram posts about Coronavirus hot spots, hospitals potentially running out of ventilators, and health care workers struggling to find enough personal protective equipment to keep them safe as they care for others, it is easy to feel overwhelmed by anxiety. In fact, I feel like so many people are so anxious right now that the anxiety seems to be just sort of floating around in the air and impacting all of us to some extent. I’ve experienced my own anxiety and stress as I have dealt with the news about the pandemic and the adjustments to my practice and home life that have resulted, and I have found a few things helpful as I have worked to manage that stress and anxiety. So, I thought I would share them with you in this blog post. These are not necessarily all my original ideas, as I have been reading suggestions by many others who are dealing with this issue as well, but hopefully they will be helpful to you:
Stay Informed, But Not Obsessed. As things have progressed with the pandemic, I found myself checking news numerous times throughout the day, including first thing in the morning and as I lay in bed at night before falling asleep. I have realized that this is too much! Since then, I have tried to limit my exposure to news about the pandemic. I want to stay informed, so I pay attention to updates from the CDC and the governor, but I am not checking news web sites several times throughout the day, and I am especially trying not to read articles about the pandemic right before I go to sleep. I look to see what updates there may be in the morning, and maybe check a couple times through the day, but that is enough. Sure, I am still talking and thinking about it quite a bit, but I don’t feel as overwhelmed.
Faith, Family, and Friends.
- In times of crisis and stress, rely on your faith to get you through and bring you comfort. You may not be able to attend your place of worship right now, but you can still worship. Many churches are putting their services online, and you can tune in anytime. Rely on your faith to get you through the uncertainty, and if your prayer or devotional life has been a little rusty lately, now is a great time to tune it up.
- Use this time to spend time with your family. You may be stuck at home, and it may make for some frayed nerves and irritation at times, but choose to find ways to connect. Watch movies together, play games together, break out the art supplies, bake or cook with your kids, or make some more plans for that vacation you may have had to cancel. Draw close to those you love and live with. For those family members that don’t live in your house, make use of the numerous videoconferencing and calling options we now have available (e.g. Facetime, Skype, Zoom, etc.) to connect with parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins that you may not have talked to in a while.
- Connect with your friends. Again, you may not be able to get together for dinner out or a drink at the pub, but you can call, text, video-call, and share memes and other things to brighten each other’s day. Your friends are the people you can cry with, complain to, laugh with, and rely on for support. Ask how you can help them, or ask them for help if you need it–that’s what friends are for.
Acknowledge Your Feelings, Choose Your Focus. This pandemic is a stark reminder that we often cannot choose our circumstances, and that fact makes for some significant challenges in life. What we can choose, however, is how we think about our circumstances–how we talk to ourselves. I don’t mean that you should just “think happy thoughts” and you’ll be happy. We need to acknowledge that the situation is difficult, and for many even life-and-death, and acknowledge our fear or frustration or whatever feelings we may be having, AND we can also choose how often and when we think about these things, and what aspects of our circumstances we choose to linger on. I’ve always liked a quote that has been attributed to Martin Luther: “You cannot keep the birds from flying over your head, but you can keep them from building a nest in your hair.” In other words, you can’t always keep yourself from having negative or anxious thoughts, but you don’t have to hang on to them. You can notice them, acknowledge them, accept them, AND THEN SHIFT YOUR ATTENTION ELSEWHERE. Pay attention to what is going through your head, and if you notice that it is full of negative, anxious self-talk, stop, take a deep breath or two, and CHOOSE where you want to put your focus in that moment.
Stay Active. One of the simplest (not easiest) things you can do to manage stress is to exercise. I can’t even count the number of studies I have seen over the past few years about the mental health benefits of physical activity, especially for depression and anxiety. At my house, we’ve been trying to take a walk every day if we can. So, get out and get some fresh air while you walk, jog, ride your bike, or hike (with proper social distance of course), or dust off that treadmill or elliptical machine or those weights in your basement and burn off some stress.
These certainly are strange times we are living in, but “this too shall pass” and we will come out the other side if we work together and watch out for one another.
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